I like going to church. I like being quiet with my thoughts for an hour on a Sunday morning. I like to hear the music and look around at the other people and try to figure out their stories. I like the drab understatedness of what people wear in New England to chuch as opposed to the bright guadiness that people wear to church in Florida. It's a good place to make observations. The windows in churches are always something special.
My husband and I were both raised Catholic but kind of grew out of it as we both got older. I still attended Catholic church periodically when we first met, but it seemed like it wasn't quite for me. Seemed like the crowds were getting older and I felt in the minority, being a single young woman.
One Catholic church, in Worcester, was great. I can't remember the name of the church - St. John's, maybe? It has a Sunday night mass with the bushy-bearded, gray haired, Father Joe. "God Bless all the sinners," he would say, "and me the worst of them all." I love that! It was definitely not the stereotypical message that one expects from the Catholic church. He talks about having a pint at the local pub. After the homily (is that what it's called?), he puts on some music, usually something old school, like the Grateful Dead or Pink Floyd and sits back and puts his hands on his big belly covered by his black priest robe and closes his eyes. Everyone meditates until the song ends. Cool Catholic. Would be the smooth jazz station if it were a radio station.
Another Catholic church, this one in Rhode Island, was not so great. I had the chance to attend a church in a different neighborhood for work - the church was holding a blood drive that I was in charge of. I figured I would get my prayers in, and do work at the same time. The priest - and I remember this specifically because I was so flabbergasted - said "if you are friends with a homosexual, then you too, are a sinner and will go to hell." I looked around to see people's reactions - no one seemed to be phased. It was an older congregation, and this was a few years ago but seriously! What!!?? This one would be conservative talk radio, which, I have actually listened to, hey, differences make the world go round, right? But this just did not sit well with me.
Shortly after that experience, I started exploring different denominations, not on a whole-hearted mission, but if I felt like it, I would pop into a church to check it out. I remember being so bored in one church, I had to sneak out.
Living on the East Side of Providence at the time, the Unitarian Universalist Church was walking distance to my house. Tried it, loved it. The minister spoke of nature, and walking, and Walden Pond and a friend she has who live out of plastic bags and how she loves them and we accept them. Not a grandoise church, no stained glass, but yes, windows, big tall windows in the front of the church, which is really beautiful in an understated way. They help, they have a food pantry for the community and coffee hour after the service and name tags for people and a system with purple - if you are new, talk to the person with the purple scarf. If you want someone to talk to you, grab a purple coffee cup. The bulletin speaks of social dinners and even some Wiccan (!) meetings, knitting circles, meditation. People go from all walks of life, all different types of people, color, gender, sexual orientation. I bet maybe even some Republicans.
A notebook is kept at the back of the church and before the chalice lighting, the words are read. Some joyful events - please pray for my sister who just had her baby boy - some sad - for my cousin who just found out he has cancer. I tear up almost every time. After that, they read the names of the military members who have been killed in the war during the past week.
Sometimes we are not completely sure of what we are doing - "do we believe in that?" I have been known to ask John. Every now and then I'll re-read the Unitarian Universalist Principles. It's very accepting of all and the way I interpret it is "accept everyone, be good to everyone, love everyone." Works for me.
This past Sunday, we attended the UU service. My choice to join the UU community was re-affirmed, because of the song - "There is more love somewhere." It's an African American hymn, very simple, very hopeful and very timely for this period of American life. After that, the choir sang a jazzy, fun version of "Walk a Mile" by Pepper Choplin and really, who doesn't need to be reminded of that every now and then?
At the end of the service, we sing Shalom Havayreem, which is a very nice way to end it.
"Peace, Friends."