Curly Straight

TJ, saying goodbye to me after I ate my breakfast of toast: Bye Mama!

Mama: Bye, TJ. Love you.

TJ: Love you too. You look pretty Mama.

Mama, hugging him: Oh thank you TJ.

TJ: You're welcome! And you smell like a ham sandwich.

Two months ago someone told me I looked pregnant in my uniform.

Grr.

Aggravating.

Then the other day at work someone said "I'm fat," and I replied "Yeah, I'm fat too." and they said "Yeah, but not as fat as me."

WTF.

Last night I had dreams about it and all I remember is telling someone (no idea who) that I have been trying to change my lifestyle but I just can't do it.

The new wedge boots excite me.

I love hearing John explain things to TJ. He doesn't hold back just because the kid is 5 years old.

He gives scientific explanations like I never could. I love it.

And it's the reason why I often say "let's ask your daddy that."

Does the whole sanitizing equipment at the gym make sense if you are going to go and get a drink from the bubbler and not sanitize that? Or the bathroom door handle? Or the faucet? See what I'm saying? Where does it stop?

Just for the record, "you look good for having two kids" isn't really much of a compliment.

TJ is in his room, having a meltdown. One that any 5-year-old would be proud of.

I shut the door and tell him he can come out when he's done.

Julia says "I want to go in there and see TJ."

I think to myself, wow. I have raised such an empathetic little girl. She is so sweet. She's probably going to hug him.

I open his door. She walks in and says:

"TJ, be quiet. You are giving me a headache."

I ate half a pomegranate tonight while wearing a white sweater. Not the brightest move.

Pomegranates are weird little fruits. They pop. It reminds me of corn kernels but sweeter and with a sweet, although somehow bitter flavor.

It's not something I could see eating anywhere but at your kitchen table.

Next time I'm wearing a red shirt.

Julia is playing with her Leappad laptop.

"Who is your best friend?" it asks her.

"TJ is my best friend," she says, as Mama and Daddy melt.

Julia, eating her lunch: Num, num, I wike this!

Learning to lose with grace is a learned skill.

I love live sports. In person. At the game. Anything. Football. Basketball. Hockey. Baseball. Anything.

However,

I find the sound of sports on a television to be absolutely annoying.

Give him stars when he behaves.

If he doesn't, go to smiley faces.

Threaten neutral faces.

Next a sad face.

Then an X.